Director Anurag Kashyap has opened up about his relationship with his daughter, Aaliyah, and how he was not present during her upbringing. In a candid interview with Film Companion, he spoke about missing her formative years and how he was absent. He also discussed how his daughter had addressed this with him, and he acknowledges that it might be too late to apologize for not being there when she was younger.
When asked about his greatest fear, the filmmaker shared, “I’m very scared of losing loved ones. I’ve realized, after a long time, that in my pursuit of making one film after another – that so-called passion with which I enjoy making movies – I left a lot of things behind, ignored a lot of things. When it really hit me hard, when my health slipped from my hand, it was so fast. I was working, doing yoga, swimming… I felt invincible. When it slipped out of my hands, it was like nothing could save you. At that time, you feel isolated, alone. And then I realized I isolated myself in my pursuit.”
He continued, “But there comes a point where I realize my daughter has suddenly grown up. I see her old pictures, and I’m like, ‘Oh my god, I miss this.’ I’m sitting with Aarti and Aaliyah’s friend Ida and Ida’s mom Preeti, and Imtiaz… They’re all talking, reminiscing about holidays and other memories. And I’m sitting there wondering, ‘Where was I?’ And I realize Imtiaz has spent more time with my daughter than I have. And then it eats you up inside. You don’t even know whether to apologize because it’s too late. My daughter is all grown up. She has forgiven me. She has come out and talked to me, asking why I was always working so much. I would try to explain that I made low-budget films, had to do twice or three times the amount of work. She understood, but still, one could have made time.”
Anurag mentioned that due to his rebellious attitude towards authorities, his daughter had to face the consequences. “People started attacking her, trolling her. She’s a social media kid. She gets affected by trolling, and she started experiencing anxiety.”